What phalloplasty is and why some people regret it
Phalloplasty is a multi-stage surgery that builds a neopenis from skin taken from the arm, leg, or abdomen. The skin is rolled into a tube and sewn onto the pubic area; the urethra is lengthened; and an inflatable or bendable rod is inserted so the organ can become stiff. Detransitioners describe the process bluntly: “I’ll take some skin here, some skin there, roll it in a tube, do some patchwork, boom, a dick, close enough!” – Beneficial_Tie_4311 source [citation:dbc96b87-8891-4b5d-9d74-1c9cb4a837db]. Because the organ is not biologically integrated, it can leak urine through several holes and must be pumped up “like a flat tyre” before sex – goldenhairbrat source [citation:666e496f-227a-42b5-915c-a79fdd4d44dc].
Loss of natural function and chronic pain
People who have undergone the procedure report lasting harm. One woman who had a partial metoidioplasty (a related surgery) says, “I no longer experience the same level of arousal, sensation, or orgasm… The sutures… are still inside of my labia. They cause me daily pain and have made sex unpleasant” – nwtae source [citation:60aee085-7240-464f-8032-1f244c780ca6]. Another account mentions a trans man who “has had one leg amputated and has nerve damage… All to try to get a lump of flesh that he can pretend is a penis” – Lucretia123 source [citation:15c24443-ba93-4fb1-b0f8-b74ce9ade6f6]. These stories illustrate that the surgery can leave lifelong medical problems far beyond appearance.
The difficulty of going back
Reversing the operation is complex and cannot restore the original anatomy. Surgeons must reroute the urethra again, risking new urological problems, and the graft sites remain scarred. “You never get your old penis back nor the functions that it had… Your urethra will again have to be rerouted and will potentially give you more urological problems” – illicitLetter source [citation:0517c1f1-19bc-46a1-83d2-513e7c99e895]. One woman seeking reversal writes, “The only concern she has is if everything is going to work properly” – ThatGirlChyna source [citation:b2ccac51-33e9-4266-8fec-53444f62a3ae].
A hopeful conclusion
These lived experiences show that the body cannot be re-shaped to match a feeling without serious, often irreversible, consequences. The path to peace lies not in surgery but in embracing gender non-conformity—living freely as yourself without trying to fit stereotypes or medicalizing natural distress. Supportive therapy, community, and time can ease dysphoria and help anyone reclaim a whole, healthy life exactly as they are.